As educators we start the beginning of every school year with the best of intentions about how we intend to “manage our classroom.” And by that I really mean, how we intend to manage the student misbehavior.
There are books, workshops, and classes that tout different classroom management programs—sometimes they are way too complicated, and sometimes I wonder if they talked to a teacher about what actually happens in the classroom. Then there are skill-based programs that focus on teaching children the skills of self-discipline.
But when it comes down to it, in the moment, when a teacher is exhausted and nothing seems to work with a particular student, our good intentions fly out the window and we end up trying to control behavior rather than help students manage their own behavior.
Teachers are, after all, responsible for making sure so many things happen, we must be doing something wrong if we can’t make our students behave. Right?
Wrong!
Don’t Fall into These Traps
If we believe we can make our students behave, we are on a slippery slope. We will find ourselves in power struggles. We know better, but we up the ante because a student challenged us–publicly. We find ourselves backed into a corner and feel defeated, questioning how we got to this place. We resort to fear tactics and empty threats—if you do that one more time, it’s straight to the office! (By the way, in case you are wondering, these tactics don’t work and you will lose every power struggle you engage in.)
What we really want is a reprieve for one day. And of course, that student that pushes your buttons is never absent!
I’ve been there more times than I care to remember. When I first started teaching, I actually believed that if I was a great teacher, I would not have any discipline issues in my classroom. That is a lot of pressure, if you think about it. For me, it meant that any time a student misbehaved, my lesson was not good enough, I didn’t engage students enough, and I wasn’t good enough as a teacher. So, I would work even harder. This was a vicious cycle that left me exhausted and wondering if I was cut out for education. Notice the focus was on me.
We are Not in Control of Anyone’s Behavior . . .
We are not in control of anyone’s behavior other than our own. We can only control what we do and how we respond.
Yes, we need to design effective and engaging lessons. Yes, we need to use research-based practices. Yes, we can create an environment that makes children want to manage their own behavior. Yes, we need to be kind and caring. And yes, we need to be firm—not mean, but firm. Don’t mistake the two. You are not friends with your students. You are the teacher who cares about your students. It is your job to hold the boundaries when they push against them. It’s what they need. Remember—kind and firm.
More importantly, we need to teach children the skills they don’t have and then give them a ton of opportunities to practice those skills.
Is it Skill or is it Will?
Children do what they do because they are trying to accomplish a goal but do not always know how to do it in an appropriate way. Their behavior is misdirected. They lack the skills to get what they want and need in appropriate ways.
Children also do what they do sometimes because it is a choice they are making. They have the skills to get what they want and need in appropriate ways, but they choose a misdirected way out of anger, frustration, hurt, revenge, embarrassment, etc.
In over 17 years in education as both a teacher and an administrator, only twice have I encountered a student whose misbehavior was a matter of choice versus missing a skill. (Both ended up attending different schools.)
So what can you do if you feel like things aren’t working and you feel like you barely have control over your classroom? You may even think, what’s the point this year? I’ll start over next year and do it differently. I want to encourage you—it’s not too late to start doing something different today.
Good classroom management takes consistent practice over time. Creating a positive culture and climate in your classroom and intentionally choosing how you will respond is a great place to start because it is the foundation. There is not a better time to start a new habit than today. It is difficult to start late in the school year, but it is not impossible if you keep your eye on the long term goal of building good classroom management habits within yourself.
Here are 5 Things You Can Do Late in the School Year to Reinforce a Solid Foundation:
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Find out what skills your students are missing and teach them those skills.
Don’t assume they are behaving badly just to make you miserable. Assume they lack the skill and coach them in it, whether it’s blurting out in class (learning to listen and build on what others say), leaving their desk and floor a mess (sharing space with others), finishing their homework or classwork on time (completing a task independently), or being a good friend on the playground (social skills for making and keeping friends). All of these are skills to be learned and practiced. Discipline With Purpose is a great skills-based program that teaches children how to be self-disciplined.
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Focus on what your students are doing right instead of what they are doing wrong.
Most children want to please their teachers. Many times, a child who misbehaves is discouraged. They may feel as though they cannot do anything right. Tell them what they are doing right. Make it personal. Talk to students individually and encourage them in what they are doing right. Build on their strengths. Warning: Do not end your encouragement with “But you also need to work on ____.” It will kill your message of encouragement.
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Hold a class meeting.
Talk with your students about how both you and they want to end the school year. What do the next three months look like? What would success look like for them and for you? How would everyone be feeling? How would everyone be contributing? Paint a vivid picture as a class, and then brainstorm together what we all need to do to help us get there. Have students make a collage, come up with a hashtag phrase, or have students paint a poster to hang in the classroom as a reminder of your collective destination. Find out what works for your class and then do it. Keep it positive!
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Surprise your students!
Use the power of novelty to mix things up a bit. Break the script and do something your students would not expect. If you never have class outside, can you teach outside for a class period? If your older students don’t get recess, can you give them a recess if they get to work and finish the lesson quickly? What about coming to school dressed up like a historical figure you are studying or a character in a book? You know your kids. What would surprise them?
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Make a conscious choice to only correct students privately.
Stop correcting students from across the room. The easiest way to do this is to walk around the classroom while you teach (proximity), and while you have students write something down in their notebooks, lean over and quietly whisper in the ear of the child creating a disruption and say something like, “I know you have what it takes to fix this. Is this something you think you can fix on your own or do you need help fixing it?” The spotlight is not on the child or the misbehavior and the other students have no idea what you said to the student. Most of the time, the student will stop the behavior. If a student says he/she needs help, then agree to meet with them after class, listen to what his/her challenge is and help come up with a plan. Have the mindset that you and your students are on the same team.
It is always best to start of the year on the right foot with a solid foundation of teaching children the skills they need to be successful. But it’s never too late to try something new or to start over. Don’t give up and wait for next year.
I believe you can do this, do you?
For those of you whose classroom management is still top notch in the remaining months of the school year, what advice do you have for those teachers who are struggling with classroom management? Leave a comment below.